Friday, January 29, 2010

Joke-Master.com :: Your Daily Jokes for - Friday, January 29th, 2010

Joke Master! Good Morning GlobalEducation100@gmail.com!
You are being blessed with the gift of laughter! Here are your 5 random jokes from Joke-Master.com for today!:
     

#1
(Category: Dirty Jokes)
One day three ducks were swimming in a pond when a police officer pulled over the first duck. The officer asked, "What's your name and what are you doing here?"

The duck replies "My name is Quack and I was blowing bubbles in the pond."

The officer saw no reason to ask anything else so he let him go. The officer then pulled the second duck over and asked, "What's your name and what are you doing?"

The second duck replied, "My name is Quack Quack and I'm blowing bubbles in the pond."

The officer then let him go as well. The third duck swam by and the officer said, "Let me guess, your name is Quack Quack Quack and you were blowing bubbles in the pond too."

The third duck said, "No, my name is Bubbles."





#2
(Category: Dirty Jokes)

Statistical Bureaucracy

As part of an equal opportunity project, a memo was sent to all the offices within External Affairs asking for "A list of all employees broken down by sex."

One of the memos was returned with the notation:
"I'm sorry: we know of nobody in this office who fits your criteria. We do, however, have two alcoholics."





#3
(Category: Dirty Jokes)
A man is visiting his wife in hospital where she has been in a coma for several years. On this visit he decides to rub her left breast instead of just talking to her. On doing this she lets out a sigh.

The man runs out and tells the doctor who says this is a good sign and suggests he should try rubbing her right breast to see if there is any reaction. The man goes in and rubs her right breast and this brings a moan from his wife.

He rushes out and tells the doctor. The doctor says this is amazing and is a real break through. The doctor the suggests the man should go in and try oral sex, saying he will wait outside as it is a personal act and he doesn't want the man to be embarrassed.

The man goes in then comes out about five minutes later, white as a sheet and tells the doctor his wife is dead. The doctor asks "what happened?"

To which the man replies "She choked."





#4
(Category: Nasty/Tasteless Jokes)
What do you call a room full of women, half with PMS, half with yeast infections?

- A whine and cheese party!





#5
(Category: Miscellaneous)
What goes: Clip clop, clip clop, clip clop, bang bang, clip clop, clip clop, clip clop? An 'Amish' drive-by shooting



 

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