Joke-Master.com :: Your Daily Jokes for - Thursday, January 14th, 2010

Good Morning GlobalEducation100@gmail.com! You are being blessed with the gift of laughter! Here are your 5 random jokes from Joke-Master.com for today!:

	#1 (Category: Funny Signs) On a bumper sticker: If you can read this, I can slam on my brakes and sue you. #2 (Category: Religious Jokes) During one of his many trips to London, George Burns became friends with a very wealthy, yet very modest, Jewish chap named Hyman Goldfarb. On one visit, Hy told George that because of his large donations to charities through the years, the queen wanted to knight him, but he was going to turn it down. "That's a great honor," George said. "Why would you turn it down?" "Because during the ceremony you have to say something in Latin," he said. "And I don't wish to bother studying Latin just for that." "So say something in Hebrew. The queen wouldn't know the difference." "Brilliant," Hy complimented me, "but what should I say?" "Remember that question the son asks the father on the first night of Passover? ... 'Why is this night different from all other nights?' Can you say that in Hebrew?" "Of course," he said. "Ma nishtana ha leila hazeh. Thank you, old sport, I shall become a knight." At the ceremony Hy waited his turn while several of the other honorees went before the queen. Finally they called his name. He knelt before Her Majesty, she placed her sword on one shoulder and then on the other, and motioned for Hy to speak. Out came "Ma nishtana ha leila hazeh." The queen turned to her husband and said, "Why is this knight different from all other knights?" #3 (Category: Funny Quotes) "A few weeks after my [breast cancer] surgery, I went out to play catch with my golden retriever. When I bent over to pick up the ball, my prosthesis fell out. The dog snatched it, and I found myself chasing him down the road yelling 'Hey, come back here with my breast!'" - Linda Ellerbee #4 (Category: Miscellaneous) What is a man's idea of safe sex? A padded headboard. #5 (Category: Miscellaneous) Q: What's the difference between greeting the Queen of England and greeting Bill Clinton? A: You only have to get down on one knee to greet the queen.

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