Friday, April 2, 2010 :: Your Weekly Jokes for - Friday, April 2nd, 2010

Joke Master! Good Morning!
You are being blessed with the gift of laughter! Here are your 5 random jokes from for this week!:

(Category: Nerd Jokes)
Minn. (UPI) - Analysts for the long-awaited, and much-heralded CRAY-7 SuperSuperSuperComputer met today in Minneapolis to discuss telecommunica- tion issues for the new machine. The CRAY-7, scheduled for delivery early next year, features a 6.5 psec(picosecond) cycle time on each of its 4096 processors, which share a 64 Kbank memory, each bank to hold 256 Gigawords of 128 bits each. CRAY Research has announced that the CRAY-7 will be cooled by submerging the entire 2.4 cubic inch spherical mainframe in the ice-moon Io, off the southern coast of Saturn. When operational under the MULTI-CUE(TM) Operating System, the CRAY-7 will simultaneously support interactive access for every man woman and child on Earth with guaranteed response time of 14.5 msec(microsecond) or better, while running real work on its 4094 background processors. Power for the new system will be ob- tained by running a drop cord from Io to well in- side the orbit of Mercury, where the intensity if the Solar flares can be converted to HyperElectri- city. The Rings of Saturn will act as a secondary storage device (a.k.a. Rotating Mass Storage) for the CRAY-7.

It is reported that much of the CRAY-7 CPU- time will be devoted to the design of the CRAY-10.

(Category: Girls vs. Boys)
Why are most Blonde jokes one-liners?
So men can understand them.

(Category: Miscellaneous)

A man had just settled into his seat next to the window on the plane when another man sat down in the aisle seat and put his black Labrador retriever between them.
The first man asked why the dog was allowed on the plane. The second man explained that he was a DEA agent and that the dog was a sniffing dog.

"His name is Sniffer, and he's the best there is," he said. "I'll show you once we get airborne when I put him to work."

The plane took off, and once it had leveled out, the agent said, "Watch this." He told Sniffer to "search."

Sniffer jumped down, walked along the aisle, and finally sat very purposefully next to a woman for several seconds. Sniffer then returned to his seat and put one paw on the agent's arm. The agent said, "Good boy." He turned to the other man and said, "That woman is in possession of marijuana, so I'm making a note of her seat number. The authorities will apprehend her when we land."

"Say, that's pretty neat," replied the first man. Once again, the agent sent Sniffer to search the aisles. The Lab sniffed about, sat down beside a man for a few seconds, returned to his seat and placed two paws on the agent's arm. The agent said, "That man is carrying cocaine, so again, I'm making a note of his seat number for the police."

The agent then told Sniffer to search again. Sniffer walked up and down the aisles for a little while, sat down for a moment, and then came racing back to the agent. He jumped into the middle seat and proceeded to poop all over the place. The first man was really disgusted by this behavior and couldn't figure out why a well-trained dog would act like that, so he asked the agent, "What's going on?"

The agent nervously replied, "He just found a bomb!"

(Category: Funny Quotes)
A wife who chortles is an irritation, but one who also regards herself as a wit is a social nuisance.
- Patrick F. McManus

(Category: Miscellaneous)
Why does a blonde only change her baby's diapers once a month? Because it says right on the box "good for up to 20 pounds."


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