Friday, May 7, 2010 :: Your Weekly Jokes for - Friday, May 7th, 2010

Joke Master! Good Morning!
You are being blessed with the gift of laughter! Here are your 5 random jokes from for this week!:

(Category: Miscellaneous)

You're so fat, you need a permit to roll over in bed!

They took your baby pictures via satellite! You're so fat!

(Category: Miscellaneous)
From a passenger ship one can see a bearded man on a small island who is shouting and desperately waving is hands.
"Who is it?" a passenger asks the captain.
"I've no dea. Every year when we pass, he goes mad."

(Category: Professional Jokes)
Never trust a doctor who tells you you're dead.

Always get a second opinion.

(Category: Religious Jokes)
An old Jewish man was once on the subway, and he sat down next to a younger man. He noticed that the young man had a strange kind of shirt collar. Having never seen a priest before, he asked the man, "Excuse me sir, but why do you have your shirt collar on backwards?"

The priest became a bit flustered but politely answered, "I wear this collar because I am a Father."

The Jewish man thought a second and responded, "Sir, I am also a Father but I wear my collar front-ways. Why do you wear your collar so differently?"

The priest thought for a minute and said, "Sir, I am the father for many."

The Jewish man quickly answered, "I too am the father of many. I have four sons, four daughters and too many grandchildren to count. But I wear my collar like everyone else does. Why do you wear it your way?"

The priest who was beginning to get exasperated thought and then blurted out, "Sir, I am the father for hundreds and hundreds of people."

The Jewish man was taken aback and was silent for a long time. As he got up to leave the subway train, he leaned over to the priest and said, "Er... Mister, perhaps, you should wear your pants backwards."

(Category: Girls vs. Boys)
A bechelor, just turned 40, began feeling desperate. "I went to a singles bar," he told a friend. "walked over to this 20-year-old woman and asked, "Where have you been all my life? she said, "Theeting!"


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