Friday, October 29, 2010 :: Your Weekly Jokes for - Friday, October 29th, 2010

Joke Master! Good Morning!
You are being blessed with the gift of laughter! Here are your 5 random jokes from for this week!:

(Category: Political Jokes)
George Washington probably did not chop down his father's cherry tree. George Washington probably did not admit it by saying,

(Category: Miscellaneous)
Q: What do lawyers use as contraceptives?
A: Their personalities.

(Category: Dirty Jokes)
Once upon a time. Little Red Riding Hood's mother (being concerned about the increase in violence in rural America) gave Little Red a .45 caliber gun for protection. Little Red kept this gun in her basket.

One summer day while on the way to her grandmother's house, a big bad wolf jumped out from behind a tree and howled "I'm going to fuck your brains out!"

Little Red pulled out her gun from the basket and calmly replied: "Oh no you're not, you're going to eat me like the story says."

(Category: Bar/Drinking Jokes)
In a darkets night, a policeman watches a staggering man trying in vain to unlock a door.
"Is this your home, after all?" the policeman asks.
"Sure, I'll prove it to you if you help me."
Inside, the man explains, "You see, this is my bedroom. And this is my wife."
"And who is the man next to her?" the policemand wants to know.
"That's me!"

(Category: Miscellaneous)
October 9, 1995

A scientist has come up with proof of something students have known for years -- chemistry lectures are boring. In an article published in the current issue of Chemistry in Britain, a university chemistry lecturer introduced a guest lecturer to a class of 50 doctoral candidates.

Then, he and his colleagues studied variations in what he calls the HTFDR -- "head-to-floor distance reduction." After about an hour , the average HTFDR dropped from 135cm to 121cm, said the author of the study, who preferred to remain anonymous.

The HTFDR immediately bounced back to normal when the speaker uttered the magic words: "And in conclusion . . ."


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